Hello everyone, just a quick post about this unfortunate event. I came across an article that reports that the young man who shot up UCSB was influenced by the MRM (which as we will see did not turn out to be the case). Good opportunity to talk about some of the issues facing us today.
MRM smear job by Daily Kos:
Yes, this article portrays the MRM negatively. Yes, the website and the author have a clear political agenda. Yes, they are pro-feminism and anti-MRM. We all know that the initial reaction to any men’s movement is going to consist of accusations of misogyny. Just put that aside for a second. Manospherians, take this moment for self-examination.
Stories like this will be used to destroy the legitimacy of the MRM in the eyes of the public. I know that the MRM can’t be held accountable for the actions of every individual man. I get that. But let’s not look the other way and deny all accountability either. I have seen so-called MRA’s whose posts, comments, etc. are inexcusable under any circumstances. And they disgust me. Unfortunately, this is nothing new. We criticize feminism for not rooting out its radical misandric elements, among other things. The MRM needs to do the same to its radical elements. I’ll say it right here: people who spread hatred of any kind, such as the people who may have influenced Elliot Rodger, are not welcome in the MRM. I’m not an authority figure in these matters, but I don’t associate with hatemongers, and I’m not the only one who has stated this. Most of the MRM has zero tolerance for this kind of bullshit. Just making this clear for the layperson.
That said, let’s talk about Elliot. I don’t know what corner of the ‘manosphere’ this guy lived in, exactly, but it appeared to be more PUA-oriented than MRM (well, anti-PUA from what I’ve read). I’ve always seen the manosphere as a support group, a means of liberating oneself from dependency upon women. Most of us men are born with this innate addiction to women (thank you, evolution). So we’re here discussing ways to kick the habit, so to speak. Clearly ‘my manosphere’ is not representative of the all-encompassing manosphere; this young man was a far cry from the level of self-actualization that I would expect from a “red-piller” (in reality, he fit more of a “purple-piller”, involuntary celibate, and/or True Forced Loneliness description). I doubt I am misjudging him, either, because he was clearly pining away from what he saw as a lack of female attention. When I say self-actualization, I’m not talking about self-confidence or anything like that. The guy wasn’t lacking for self-confidence at all, describing himself as the “supreme gentleman” and “the true Alpha Male.”
What I mean by self-actualization is the recognition of one’s own worth as an individual. Elliot seemed to only see himself as a perfect mate for a woman, not a good person in and of himself. That is not what a men’s movement should be about. That’s not what it is about. To me, this perfectly highlights a problem with a “men’s movement” that promotes the pursuit of sexual relationships (i.e. Pick Up Artists). Men will compete against each other for women until the end of time — until our species goes extinct or some other radical shift occurs. How can you truly be acting in the best interests of men when you are really just exacerbating the mating competition by metaphorically throwing men unequipped into the highly competitive mating arena?
Elliot Rodger’s YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/ElliotRodger
(I found no MRM channels on his subscription feed, nothing even remotely related that I can recognize. There are PUA and men’s dating advice channels. Any well-informed individual knows that Pick Up Artists are not even remotely related to the Men’s Rights Movement.)
Here’s the twist: Elliot became exactly the like the “obnoxious brutes” (i.e. “men”) that he hated. In fact, five of the seven people killed were men (counting himself) and two were women. Yet the article on Daily Kos begins with “trigger warning: violence against women”. The following article shows that he is as much of a misandrist as a misogynist (so I guess he is a misanthrope). He apparently mused about the possibility of releasing a virus, to which only he would have the antidote, that would kill all men. Not all women, all men. Additionally, the articles suggest that he was psychologically unstable, which is the case with most mass shootings. Yet the article on Daily Kos blames it on the MRM. How is this not surprising?
An opposing viewpoint to the Daily Kos:
And then he killed himself. He was a college student just like me, around my age, and probably more like myself than I’d like to admit. The difference is how we understand the dynamics between the sexes and how we see others in relation to ourselves. Elliot came from a wealthy background and felt entitled. He was narcissistic and apparently had psychological issues that his parents tried to help with, but they were failed by the mental health system and the police who dismissed Elliot as too “kind and polite” to pose a threat to himself and others. Perhaps if Elliot had actually been associated with the MRM community, things would have turned out differently for the better. Perhaps if he had learned about the MGTOW community, he would have come to terms with himself and his struggles with women and loneliness. But unfortunately, he did not find these communities and did not achieve self-actualization. He could not have, because the feminist society that we live in offers no refuge for men and no alleviation for their struggles.
That’s about all I have to say about the topic. Thanks for reading.
Edited: 26 May 2014